1992 – A Real Guitar and Band with Instruments

After my brother received a Sega Genesis for Christmas, we were playing Sonic the Hedgehog a lot. What a fascinating new game! This little blue guy running so fast, going around overhead loops, collecting coins, and fighting the various bad guys created by the evil Dr. Robotnik. On January 26^th, I went over to my classmate Joseph Miller’s house to watch the Washington Redskins vs. Buffalo Bills in Super Bowl XXVI. I had never had much interest in watching football, but it was fun that night.

The kids on my block were very much into hockey. Sometimes I joined them. I had a hockey stick and roller blades. I was pretty good at skating and could handle the puck halfway decent, but I was not a fan of the violent aspects of the sport. Reckless kids would swing their sticks a bit too close to fellow players’ faces or other body parts. The neighbors were never happy with us because we were always hitting their cars with a puck, a hockey stick, or our bodies. We also had to constantly keep an eye on passing cars to make sure we weren’t obstructing the street when they wanted to pass. I was not the biggest fan of playing sports on the block, especially in the street. Sometimes it was fun, but often I preferred to be inside playing video games or watching TV. This was why the kids sometimes referred to me as John the Hermit.

On Saturday nights, my friends, brother, and I would gather at our house to watch SNICK (Saturday Night Nickelodeon)[1] which featured, amongst others, two of my favorite shows, Ren and Stimpy[2] and Are You Afraid of the Dark[3]. Also, on Nickelodeon at other timeslots, I loved to watch Salute Your Shorts[4] and The Adventures of Pete and Pete[5].

Later, on Saturday nights I switched to MTV to catch the Countdown to the Ball and then at midnight Headbanger’s Ball[6] hosted by Riki Rachtman. This was a good incentive for a sleepover with a friend. However, friend or not, I would bring blankets and pillows down from the second floor of the house into the first floor living room and camp out so that I could watch heavy metal and hard rock music videos for as long as my eyes and ears could handle it. This was also a perfect time for junk food and beverages. I was introduced to some awesome bands through Headbanger’s Ball. There were, however, often many music videos and featured acts that I was not a fan of and had to patiently sit through between commercials. But I was absorbing the culture of being a “headbanger” and for the most part I thought it was cool.

In late winter the rock n’ roll comedy masterpiece Wayne’s World was playing in theaters and judging from the hype which came in the form of movie trailers, ads, and related music videos, it promised to be a lot of fun. I couldn’t wait to see it and when I did, I loved it. It was awesome when pop and rock culture interwove itself in various ways as with Wayne’s World. It was a feature film, there were related skits on Saturday Night Live, there were rock celebrities and cool songs in the movie and then related music videos airing on MTV such as the epic Wayne’s World version of “Bohemian Rhapsody”. A real cool and fun vibe altogether.

I had owned toy guitars for a few years now and beginning in late 1991, I had begun to plead with Mom for a real electric guitar and amplifier. Mom made a deal with me that if I had a good 2^nd trimester report card that she would help me, in combination with money I had saved, to buy a guitar and an amplifier. She went so far as to type up a contract which we both signed, and even Nana signed as a witness. Since this would be an investment, she didn’t want it to be a wasted purchase with me not taking it seriously. Using a typewriter, she created this real and comical contract detailing various requirements that I would need to meet to merit the object of my desire. Such stipulations included: timely performance of chores, junk food reduction, personal hygiene, homework, brotherly love clause (no-bullying), and “maintenance of motherly sanity clause” which basically urged me to be less sarcastic, inappropriate, and annoying. Not only did I agree to the contract, but I even made the honor roll on my second trimester report card.

So, it was in early spring when Big Konrad took me to the local King James Music store (on Flatbush Avenue near the corner of Avenue S) to purchase my first guitar and amplifier. The guitar was an off-white Rok Axe in the style of a Fender Stratocaster. The amplifier was a small fuzzy gray and black square box called a Matrix. Yes, finally I have my own real electric guitar! Quite strangely, once I got home and had a chance to play around with it in the basement, I became bored with it surprisingly quickly. I slid my finger up and down the neck making sliding sounds. I tried plucking some combinations of strings. It didn’t sound at all like my favorite bands, and I was beginning to feel like I was missing some key component. I put the guitar on a stand in the corner of the room and there it stood gathering dust for months. 

Lots of cool new music was coming out with featured music videos on MTV. What was becoming known as grunge music, or the Seattle sound was made more evident with Soundgarden’s “Rusty Cage” and Nirvana’s “Come as You Are”. Grunge took some getting used to. I basically liked it but preferred more of a heavy metal or funky rock sound. “Under the Bridge” showcased a mellower side of the energetic and funky Red Hot Chili Peppers and increased my interest in the band. Weeks later I enjoyed hearing their contrasting and heavy funk rocker “Suck My Kiss” when that music video came out. One song I liked immediately was Ugly Kid Joe’s “Everything About You”. It was bright, catchy, fun, and a little nasty for good measure. Iron Maiden’s first single “Be Quick or Be Dead” from their upcoming new album Fear of the Dark was a departure from their traditional sound, but it grew on me. When the Freddie Mercury Tribute Concert aired on April 20^th, I didn’t know much about him, but I thought it was amazing that so many rock stars got together to perform in his honor. I was particularly impressed when Queen teamed up with Axl Rose and Elton John for “Bohemian Rhapsody” and when Queen played “Stone Cold Crazy” with Tony Iommi and James Hetfield on vocals. 

Even though neither of us could play, Jack Lanza and I soon made plans for a band with both of us on guitar. I with my new Rok Axe and Jack with his Dad’s black and white Fender Telecaster. My school friends’ names were in the mix as potential bandmates (Mike Florino and Mike Deveraux), but it didn’t seem like they were serious about it, so Jack and I were still looking to fill the drum and bass positions.

Like school, I did not have many close friends on my baseball team, but Roddy Smithers was an exception. Roddy was a fun, heavyset kid, an only child living with a single mom, grandma, and uncle. He had a rebellious streak and to some extent he was spoiled, which had its perks as his friend at times because if he wanted to do something it could generally happen (e.g., going to a distant mall, having a sleepover, eating fast food, or other things involving simple materialistic pleasures). On the evening of June 6^th, I slept over Roddy’s house to watch the TV special Guns N’ Roses: Live in Paris. His house was always freezing in the summer from the air-conditioning which was basically enjoyable except when we came in from his pool. We were fellow rockers into collecting musical paraphernalia (cassette tapes, CDs, VHS tapes, magazines, posters, t-shirts, et cetera). Some of the bands we both liked included Nirvana, Pearl Jam, Ugly Kid Joe, Guns ‘n’ Roses, and Metallica.

In mid-summer, friend and neighbor Yae got a red Stratocaster-style Gibson Epiphone guitar for his birthday and asked to join our band. Even though that would make three guitarists we agreed. One day, Roddy was hanging out in The BASEment with some of us listening to Guns ‘n’ Roses and we mentioned our band to him and asked him if he would be willing to get a bass and learn it so he could play with us. He liked the idea and accepted. Soon he had a bass and amplifier of his own.

Late that summer John Guglielmino Jr. (Johnny G.) came over. I hadn’t seen him in a long time, and he was excited to hear that I got a guitar. He asked me to bring it up from the basement, where it was still busy gathering dust, to show him. He took it in his hands and plucked the first few notes of Metallica’s “One” and then “Enter Sandman”. I was amazed! 

“Wow, that sounds like those songs! You mean this guitar can play those songs?? I couldn’t get it to work!” I blurted.

“Yep. I’ll show you.” answered Johnny.

It had seemed impossible. He taught me how to play those two riffs and a few others. From that day on, it was off to the races for me, and it wasn’t long before I had shown enough initiative that my mother had agreed to sign me up for guitar lessons with a local guitar teacher[7].

Our nearby East 35^th Street neighbor Sylvia heard about the kids on the block forming a band and offered us a drum set. We gladly accepted the drum set donation. The set was a sparkly orange kit from the 60s or 70s. We needed a drummer and so we recruited Yie, sometimes also referred to by his other nickname “The Animal”. We figured hitting things would work well for his physically bombastic character. 

After receiving the drum donations from our neighbor, we went down to Yae and Yie’s basement to set them up. This was an exciting and mysterious moment. None of us had ever actually played drums so we didn’t know which part was which or in what arrangement they should go. We looked at posters of rock bands for direction. Yie went to work tightening metal poles with wingnuts. Fortunately, we had an ace in the hole. Johnny G was there, and he seemed to be a few steps ahead of us with practical musical knowledge. After a couple of hours, there stood something resembling a drum kit. When it was played, it was similar to what we understood drums to sound like, though not quite. 

Our new band with real instruments began jamming. We called ourselves Primal Target and alternated playing together in both The BASEment and in Yae and Yie’s basement. Among whatever else we tried to play there were the originals “Mayhem” and “Loud and Heavy” as well as Metallica’s “For Whom the Bell Tolls” which we did our best to make sound like actual music. 

As I played baseball on the St. Columba Traveling Team throughout the spring and summer as I had for the past several years, I had to be honest with myself. I wasn’t really enjoying it anymore. Did I ever deeply enjoy playing baseball on a team? Not sure, but I did commit to it throughout childhood as a means of honoring my father as I felt a connection to him through doing so. As the baseball season drew to a close with the end of summer, I had a conversation with Mom and admitted that I’d prefer not to continue playing baseball the following year. It was no secret that I had been feeling that way and she did not try to dissuade me. When I admitted out loud that I wanted to quit the baseball team it was very emotional for me. Once all the games were over, I folded up my uniform and “retired” it into a clothes drawer. Though I felt silly, I allowed myself a moment with my tears.

I had been styling my hair in a mushroom cut and growing the bangs long, which I thought was so cool. However, according to the St. Thomas Aquinas School Handbook under the “Grooming” section: “Hair must be neat and well-groomed at all times. Fad haircuts are not permitted, and boys’ hair may not be below shirt collar”.  I was hoping they would make an exception for me (or that Mom would), but a few days before the start of 7^th grade I found myself coming out of the barber shop with my bangs cut much shorter than I wanted. I threw a fit when I got home. Exclaiming “I hate this haircut!” I went to the bathroom with a pair of scissors and promptly started chopping away at my bangs reducing them even further. Shocked by what I’d just done, I started crying but couldn’t take it back. So, for several weeks, I dealt with a strange mushroom cut with short-cropped bangs.

I was in 7^th grade at St. Thomas Aquinas with Ms. Zanfini, a good teacher. As a school student, I was strong in English language and arts. I was weaker in math and science. I also fluctuated between being a responsible and focused student, to a slacker who zoned out in musical or other daydreams when I was finding the school lessons boring. However, I did have a soft spot for wanting the authority figures in my life to have a favorable impression of me. My report cards also show, through an admixture of good and mediocre grades, that while I was trying to be cooperative, I was not trying to be a kiss up.

At the very least, the lessons I was learning in language arts were paying off. On October 14^th, while listening to albums by Alice in Chains, Megadeth, and Metallica I sat down with some looseleaf paper, markers, and a pen. In addition to some rock band-inspired drawings I composed a history of our band Primal Target including the origins of my very first band Snake Eyes a couple years before (with Jack and Joe Lanza, and sometimes my brother Billy).  

Around Thanksgiving, Uncle Rob heard that I was creating a rock band with friends. He mentioned that he had a variety of drums and cymbals in his basement, and would we want them? Sure, of course we would, thank you! And soon we had several more drum kit pieces enter The BASEment. Now we had more toms, stands, cymbals, and another snare drum, high-hat, and bass pedal. Once we added these to the sparkly orange set, it became something of a big Frankenstein drum kit. Radical!